Ok. Bush sucks, Persephone is ill and Chasmyn lost power last night. It was down all over her section of the city. It's back now. Hail Eris!

Road Trip
I had forgotten how much fun a road trip could be. Those simple, one-day jaunts of my adolescence seemed so far behind me. I'm a grown-up now, I live by the clock (snicker), I can't be wasting time driving to nowhere, right? Oh, so wrong!

Chasmyn got a call from a rancher who raises organic cattle, they were culling the herd again; would she like to buy a side of beef? You bet she would! Lots of people got on the beef-buying bandwagon this time around. My family tossed in $100.
The next 2 weeks were torture for me. It pains me to buy meat from the grocery store when I know the good stuff is just around the corner.
Yesterday was the perfect day to pick up our processed half-cow. It was nice and cold all day, so the meat wouldn't thaw during the trip. The processing plant is in Perryville. I'd never even heard of Perryville before. It's way down highway 55. I was picturing a tiny town of 1,000 people, pick-up trucks with gun racks, maybe even a little red schoolhouse. "This should be quite an adventure in people watching!" I thought.

Chasmyn picked me up before 9:00, and we were off. The 20+ miles from my house to Arnold went by in an eyeblink. I had forgotten how easy travel is when you have company. We chatted about everything and nothing, drinking coffee while traveling a nearly empty highway. This was my first road trip with Chasmyn. (How could we have known each other for so long, and never road-tripped together?) I learned a lot from riding with her. As usual, I pointed out wildlife along the way. Some things never change. Every time I spotted something, Chasmyn saw it too. I marveled at that.

Most long trips for me go like this, "Look, a hawk! Oh. You missed it. Look, a cow! Oh, you missed it. Bunnies! You missed them." etc. With Chasmyn, I'd say "hawk!" and she'd say, "I see it!" It was fun! So we whiled away the miles, doing all the neat road trip stuff. We visited a rest stop to stare at the map. The bathroom had auto-flush toilets and an
automatic sink. Whoa! All you had to do was soap up, the sink did the rest. It rinsed your hands with warm water, and dried them too. (warm water in a Missouri rest stop???) I felt like I'd stepped into a science-fiction novel.

We finally get to Perryville, which had neither gun racks, nor a little red schoolhouse. It had a Wal-Mart instead. It also had a new looking community center, a beautiful retirement community and a welcoming feel. When I think rural - I think Carbondale. This place was as far from Carbondale as could be. The last of my reservations with Chasmyn moving to rural Minnesota vanished in Perryville. If most of rural America is like Perryville, move me there!

The processing plant was outside of town, and it wasn't what I'd expected either. It reeked, yes; but the place was nice. I had expected a gore-splattered butcher and a bunch of frightened animals, or a tiny little shack as a front for the meat that was discreetly murdered elsewhere. What we found was a pleasant small business and a nice guy in tight jeans. I mean 1980's tight jeans. I wondered if he had plans for reproducing, because his nuts sure weren't making viable sperm in those Levi's. The funny thing is, I didn't notice a thing until he turned around. My ever observant eyes spotted the worn mark of a chew canister on the right pocket. The left pocket was not as worn as the right, but both sides would eventually match. The left pocket now held the chew. It's amazing, the things you can tell from looking at a man's backside. I could tell that he never carried a wallet there, but he'd only just recently switched chew-holding sides. From the way he walked, he was comfortable with the canister in either pocket. Nice butt, by the way. I would have been all over him in the 80's. (Ooh, I just had a thought. I've been assuming it was chew... it could have been a round tin of mints, or even hand balm. Gasp! Assumptions are bad things)

Anyway, He loaded 300 lbs of meat into the trunk for us and my, what a wonderful sight that was! Mmmm, meat. He asked if we wanted the heart, liver or tongue. Chasmyn and I both paused, lost in our own thoughts. I don't know what she was thinking, but I was weighing waste vs. getting my family to eat unusual cow bits. I decided, yes, I did want the tongue and heart. Chasmyn took the liver, somebody might want it. I've never had tongue before. The Joy Of Cooking tells how to prepare it, so I'm gonna cook it up and take it to Grandma. Kudos to Chasmyn for the idea!
On the way back to St. Louis, I saw the strangest (for me) sight. I'd been looking at wildlife in the fields we passed, and I saw a cat! In the next field I saw another cat! It's not that I didn't think cats lived on farms, I've just never seen one in a field before.

So there it is. My adventure in Perryville; complete with tight jeans, kitty cats and cow tongue.