Uh oh, I been tagged!

Chasmyn tagged me with a meme. And here it is:

What follows is a list of different occupations. You must select at least five of them. You may add more if you like to your list before you pass it on (after you select five of the items as it was passed to you). Of the five you selected, you are to finish each phrase with what you would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.

Here’s that list:

If I could be a scientist… If I could be a farmer…
If I could be a musician… If I could be a doctor…
If I could be a painter… If I could be a gardener…
If I could be a missionary… If I could be a chef…
If I could be an architect… If I could be a linguist…
If I could be a psychologist… If I could be a librarian…
If I could be an athlete… If I could be a lawyer…
If I could be an innkeeper… If I could be a professor…
If I could be a writer… If I could be a backup dancer…
If I could be a llama-rider… If I could be a bonnie pirate…
If I could be a midget stripper… If I could be a proctologist…
If I could be a TV-Chat Show host… If I could be an actor…
If I could be a judge… If I could be a Jedi…If I could be a mob boss…
If I could be a backup singer…If I could be a CEO…
If I could be a movie reviewer… If I could be a monkey’s uncle…

These are mine:
If I could be a scientist… I would create a disaster prediction tool based on butterflies flapping their wings in Asia, planetary alignments and children's fussiness. And still no one would listen.
If I could be a movie reviewer… I would film my review in the car, on the drive home from the theater. (Thanks, Hubby-Man for inventing the idea a decade ago)
If I could be a Jedi… I could slice and toast bread at the same time with my lightsabre.
If I could be a midget stripper…I still wouldn't do VIP dances.
If I could be a CEO… Wait. I am a CEO. Heh heh heh.

Persephone
Fraggle
and Cowgirl
You've been tagged!